There were 900 students in the auditorium. I was killing it. Three and a half minutes into my five-minute speech, I had them right where I wanted them. Feeling confident about wrapping up the class president election, I looked up at the audience to take it all in.
AND THEN “IT HAPPENED.”
My mind went blank as I looked back down at my index cards. I had forgotten where I was. An uncomfortable 10-seconds went by, and it felt more like an hour. Then, it just rolled out of my mouth.
“Awe s***, I lost my ******g place.” The students loved it! I won the election in a landslide and was immediately disqualified for using inappropriate language at the assembly. That also cost me a one-day suspension.
My lesson learned; I sure knew how to connect with people! However, proper planning prevents poor performance!
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Everyone communicates, few connect
I learned early on that needing to connect with people in the audience makes a good speech or presentation a great one. Communication is essential, but when you click, things happen. In John Maxwell’s book, Everyone Communicates, Few Connect, we learn that connecting goes beyond words. Audiences will remember only 7% of what they hear us say! Over 90% of the impression we leave our audience comes from our thoughts, emotions, and actions.
As a young pup in my sales career, I had the opportunity to present in front of Procter & Gamble. A one-time shot at a chance to begin development on a potential $100 million project. The time slot was 60-minutes to present whatever it was that I thought was essential to the research & development group at P&G. I had 3-weeks to prepare, and I sure as heck didn’t want to have another “aw shucks” moment like I did in 9th Grade. So, I designed, researched, and studied everything that could have anything to do with the project.
A few days before I was to present, I sat with a mentor of mine to get his input. I brought out my overheads (for those of you, this is pre-Power Point). I had over 60 pages of information available to me. There wasn’t anything missing that could have needed to be said. After precisely 57 minutes, I finished and looked for approval.
My mentor looked at me and said the words that I will remember forever:
“Son, don’t say in blah, blah, what you can say in blah.”
We then tore the presentation apart and rewrote the entire discussion. As we did this, my mentor began to ask me questions about the project. After all the research I had gone through, I confidently answered these questions. He then wondered aloud, “When are you going to get them to ask questions? What do they want to know?” In other words, when would I connect their needs and wants with what our company had to offer? When was I going to connect with them?
I SPENT SO MUCH TIME PREPARING WHAT I WANTED TO SAY: THAT I WAS NEGLECTING THE AUDIENCE.
Unlike 9th Grade, I would not commit one of Maxwell’s unpardonable sins of being unprepared! I wouldn’t lose my place. I knew this material like the back of my hand. There were 60+ pages of information in my briefcase, but I started the presentation with the overhead machine turned off.
We began the session with me asking them questions about where they were in the project, what obstacles they had, what were the primary benefits to P&G to launching this project, and many others. Initially, the group was reserved. However, after a few minutes, the conversation began flowing as they saw that I was sincere in my questioning and was proving to be an industry expert. I went to my briefcase as they voiced their needs. Turning the overhead machine on, I showed them the slides that applied directly to their concerns.
People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care,” and that is a fact that should always remain at the back of our minds when relating with people because you develop credibility when you connect and show that you genuinely want to help them. - John Maxwell
I used less than ten transparencies during my 60 minutes. If measured, I spoke less than 15% of the time. With all the research and preparation I had gone through, I could answer every concern they expressed. We had time to connect deeply on what they needed to know about, not what I wanted to say!
If you are wondering, yes, my company won this opportunity. It took a few years of development, which turned into a $150 million annual contract to supply materials to P&G.
Most people communicate, but few connect. In that room, on that day, we connected.
What I learned that day is that connection is hard work. In the 9th Grade, a simple slip of the tongue and humor helped me win the election. But, as we grow in our careers, connecting with other professionals is much more challenging. As Maxwell’s book “Everyone Communicates, Few Connect” states, it takes energy, open-mindedness, and a willingness to put their needs before yours.
Before you ask someone for a vote, buy your product, or anything else, show that you care about them. Another Maxwell quote is appropriate here:
Leaders touch a heart before they ask for a hand - John Maxwell
At the Kole Performance Group, we facilitate the course “Everyone Communicates, Few Connect”. Gather your top management team together, and let’s work on the most important part of being a leader. It is hard work, but it will lead to a better tomorrow.